Fear Isn't the Problem: It's the Story You Keep Telling Yourself

Fear Isn't the Problem: It's the Story You Keep Telling Yourself

Dr. Peggie (PK) Kirkland:

 [00:00:00] Welcome back my beautiful empty nesters. This is PK, and today we are continuing our three-part conversation about rediscovering passion in the empty nest season. In part one, we laid the groundwork. We talked about deferred passions, why the spark never truly disappears. The emotional shifts of the empty nest and how finding your purpose supports your mental, physical, and cognitive health.

Today, we're going to unpack common challenges that show up on your way to pursuing your passions. before we do. I've got a free resource to help you get started. It's called Your Pathway to Passion. It's a five-day challenge that walks you through [00:01:00] small, doable steps to help you reconnect with your interests, your strengths, and your purpose.

You don't have to figure this out alone. Just click the link in the description and show notes to get this free resource.

 Let's get back to talking about some common challenges you may encounter along the way. Let's face it, you're no longer in your twenties, thirties, or forties. So you may find yourself thinking that you're too old when you're trying to start something new. This is a common challenge, this belief that you're too old to start Now.

You might catch yourself thinking, if I haven't done it by now, it's too late. Personally, I had to rewrite my thoughts about my podcasting journey when I listened to people in podcasting communities who are starting at ages 88 and 90. And [00:02:00] with Gusto. The good news for you is that having a purpose in life actually helps you.

The challenges of daily life by lowering negative health effects like depression, anxiety, and the risk of cardiovascular events. So that alone should help you eliminate the excuse of being too old. I think we've all experienced trying something once and having it not work out the way we hoped. Maybe someone dismissed your idea, laughed or didn't take you seriously, ladies. That's why you have to be careful about whom you share your ideas with because there are a lot of dream killers out there. I'm sure you've encountered a few. But what if the loudest voice is your own inner critic replaying old doubts and past disappointments over time?

 What happens is that you become [00:03:00] fearful and that fear convinces you that it's safer not to try again. Let me challenge you to think of fear not as a stop sign, but instead as a signal that something meaningful is calling you forward. Another common challenge is the trait of perfectionism and comparison with others. For example, you're scrolling through social media and you see younger people living out what feels like your dream. I see young people doing. With apparently little effort. What? It took me thousands of dollars and years of study to learn in a college setting.

Granted, that was many generations ago, but it can still feel irritating at times. You might find yourself in the same situation. That's when that voice can creep in and ask, who do you think you [00:04:00] are or tell you you're too late? Just so you know, I do this podcast in spite of those voices, and you too can pursue your passion.

When the perfectionism bug tells you that if you can't do it flawlessly, you shouldn't do it at all. And when comparing yourself to others steals your joy and ignores your wisdom, life, experience, and resilience. I urge you to straighten your back and push through because you've got what it takes. This brings us to a fourth challenge you may face on the way to pursuing your passion.

That is time and energy. Let's say for example, that you're still working or you're a caregiver for aging parents, or you may be supporting adult children. Or navigating health challenges of your own. Those scenarios may leave you [00:05:00] feeling tired. Unmotivated and basically feeling stretched thin. The truth is that when energy is limited, your passions often get pushed aside, but here's a little secret. Pursuing your passions doesn't always require huge chunks of time.

Sometimes your passions simply need your permission to matter again. Finally, there's guilt. That quiet, persistent feeling that whispers, it's selfish to focus on me even when your kids are grown. The habit of putting yourself last is hard to break. You're going to feel torn between who you've always been for others and who you're becoming now, but honoring your passion isn't selfish.

It's an act of self-respect. It's sending the [00:06:00] message that I know that I matter. My dreams matter. Okay, that's it for part two of Pursuing Your Passion. Before we close today, let me tell you about part three. Part three is where we talk about the how. You learn five research backed strategies that you can use to pursue your passion in a way that actually fits your life. Now you won't wanna miss that conversation.

 before I sign off. I'd like to share with you a modern parable for women navigating midlife transitions. The title of this parable is The Woman and the Winding Path. Come into the Circle Sisters, and let me tell you a story. There was once a woman who stood at the edge of a [00:07:00] path. She had long men to walk. She had noticed it years ago, quietly curving off to the side of her life. But there was always a reason not to take it. Children needed her.

Work demanded her. Others depended on her steadiness, her reliability, her strength. So she told herself later, years passed. One day the house grew quiet. The calendar opened up and she found herself standing there again facing the same path. Only now it felt unfamiliar. Overgrown and uncertain. She hesitated.

The path didn't look smooth. There were bends. She couldn't see around. Stones scattered along the way and stretches that disappeared into [00:08:00] shadow. A voice inside her whispered, what if you're too late? What if you don't know how anymore? But another voice quieter, steadier said, what if you are finally ready?

So she took one small step Almost immediately, she stumbled. The path was uneven. She scraped her knee on self-doubt, tripped over comparison, and felt the ache of wondering if she should turn back.

She paused catching her breath. That's when she noticed something she hadn't seen before. along the sides of the path were signs, not signs that told her exactly where to go, but reminders of what she carried with her.

Now, patience she didn't have years ago. Wisdom earned through [00:09:00] experience, courage shaped by everything she had already survived. she realized then the path hadn't become harder. She had become stronger, so she continued slowly, imperfectly, sometimes stopping to rest. She learned to adjust her pace.

She learned that detours weren't failures, but invitations to see something new. She learned that progress didn't always look dramatic. It often looked like showing up again tomorrow, and one day without fan fear, she noticed something else. She was no longer asking will I ever get there. She was thinking, I'm glad I started because the path wasn't just leading her toward a [00:10:00] destination.

It was leading her back to herself. My beautiful empty nesters. If you're standing at the edge of a winding path right now, unsure whether to begin, remember this. The challenges you see ahead are not proof that you shouldn't start. They are proof that this journey matters.

 Okay, ladies, that's your story for today. Now if you're thinking, I don't even know where to begin, I want you to know you don't have to figure this out alone. I've created a free resource called Your Pathway to Passion. It's a five day challenge designed to help you reconnect with your interests, strengths, and sense of [00:11:00] purpose in small doable steps. You can download it by clicking the link in the description or show notes my beautiful empty nesters. We are done here for today. 

🎁 FREE RESOURCE
Download Your Pathway to Passion, a free 5-day challenge designed to help you reconnect with what truly lights you up—one gentle step at a time.
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🎧 Be sure to tune in for Part 3, where we’ll move from insight to action with practical strategies for pursuing passion in this season of life.

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