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March 08, 2022
Why Your Legacy Should be one of Self-love and not Self-sacrifice!

Happy international Women’s Day! And Happy Women’s History Month! This time of year is an opportunity to celebrate the contributions women have made to the culture, history and society of the United States, as well as their ...

Happy international Women’s Day! And Happy Women’s History Month!  

This time of year is an opportunity to celebrate the contributions women have made to the culture, history and society of the United States, as well as  their contributions to the world-at-large.  But have you stopped to think about what it takes to fulfill these roles effectively? 

When you look at your own life, do you find that you are putting yourself on the back burner in order to meet the needs of all those who are depending on you for mental, physical, emotional, financial support?  Will your legacy be one of self-love or self-sacrifice?

In this episode, PK urges women to take a moment to take stock of their lives and to make the necessary adjustments in self-care that would help them to meet the needs of everyone else who depends on them whether at home or in society.

Key Takeaways from this episode:

  •  The United Nations General Assembly adopted its resolution on the observance of International Women’s Day in 1975
  • Historically, women have been taught that loving themselves is selfish
  • Modern psychology says that not to  prioritize self-love and self-care could result in serious damage to your overall wellbeing. 
  • There’s nothing wrong with saving for a rainy day, but there has to be a balance between saving for unforeseen circumstances and investing in your self-care
  • Having self-compassion is critical to your emotional health

And while you’re at it, don't forget to grab your FREE Affirmation eCards to shift your mindset, raise your self-esteem and boost your self-confidence.   Choose one or two that resonate with you, and make a habit of repeating them several times throughout the day, especially when you wake up in the morning, and at night before you go to bed. As you use them, observe the effect they have on you: 

  • Do they make you feel more loving toward yourself and more confident? 
  • Do they increase your belief in your abilities?  
  • Do they make it easier for you to take life in stride? 

Try to be aware of how your mind and body react to your practice of repeating affirmations.  Be consistent with this practice and you’ll see the difference over time. Just click the link! FREE Affirmation eCards.

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Connect with PK:
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FREE Affirmation eCards


Peggie Kirkland  0:04  
Welcome to the Momma's Motivational Messages podcast, where women learn to stop putting themselves on the back burner, and start paying attention to caring for themselves first, so they can be better for everyone else in their lives. I know you'll be inspired by the stories of resiliency and starting over of health and self-healing, of gaining clarity through journaling, of showing self -ove through world travel, and the list goes on. I encourage you to relax and enjoy. I'm your host, Peggie Kirkland, PK.

Peggie Kirkland  0:45  
Hi, everyone. As you know, I usually publish new episodes on the first and third Wednesday of the month, if they're four Wednesdays, and the second and fourth Wednesday, if there are five Wednesdays in the month, as this month has.

Peggie Kirkland  1:05  
However, I'm publishing this episode today, in celebration of International Women's Day. Let's hear it for all the amazing, beautiful, strong, capable women of faith, women of wisdom all over the world. Yes, happy International Women's Day. 

Peggie Kirkland  1:28  
Now, I know you're also aware that March is Women's History Month. During this month, we take time to reflect on the contributions women have made to the culture, history and society of the United States. Did you know that this celebration was started as just a weeklong celebration by the school district of Sonoma and California in 1978?  Well, that's where it had its humble beginnings.

Peggie Kirkland  2:02  
It later caught on in other communities, until Congress actually passed a resolution not only to continue the celebrations, but to extend it from one week to one month. And as I said, today, is International Women's Day. Now, this day has been sponsored by the United Nations since 1975. And here's an interesting fact. The United Nations General Assembly cited the following reasons when it was adopting its resolution on the observance of International Women's Day.

Peggie Kirkland  2:48  
I want you to pay close attention to this resolution. Here it is:  "To recognize the fact that securing peace, and social progress and full enjoyment of human rights and fundamental freedoms require the active participation, equality and development of women, and to acknowledge the contribution of women to the strengthening of international peace and security." Let that sink in for a moment.

Peggie Kirkland  3:25  
I'm sure you will agree with me that at no time in history, has this been more important than right now, as we witness the atrocities taking place in Ukraine, and the role women are playing in trying to keep their families safe. 

Peggie Kirkland  3:44  
Why am I sharing all of this with you?  It's  because I want you to recognize just how much responsibility you shoulder as a woman. It's not just your families and friends who look to you for their support and advancement. But the world in general. Ladies, what a gift we are to the world. Look, the United Nations recognized it, I just shared their resolution with you.So what does this mean for you as an individual?  You need to take better care of yourself. 

Peggie Kirkland  4:24  
Historically, women have been taught that loving themselves is selfish, while self sacrifice is a characteristic to be admired. In fact, many women from my generation have internalized this falsehood from watching their own mothers leave themselves without. I can attest to that. And mothers did this in order to ensure that their families had what they needed. Things like not spending a lot on expensive wardrobes never taking vacations, or always going away on low budget vacations, doing their self-care maintenance at home, rather than paying to have them done. You know, things like hair and nails, facials, massages; always saving for a rainy day. Not that there's anything wrong with saving for a rainy day. But finding a balance is important.

Peggie Kirkland  5:24  
Fortunately, you my Gen X listeners are very aware that taking care of yourself is not selfish. And that's a good thing. But that's not enough.My question to you though, is, how were you putting that knowledge into practice? The truth is that you have to pay attention to your mental, physical, emotional, social, professional, and financial health. If you're going to be healthy, for those in your life, in your community, and the world at large, who count on you.

Peggie Kirkland  6:06  
Modern psychology says that not to do so could result in serious damage to your overall well being. And we talked about the importance of the pillars of self-care during our Valentine's Day seven day mini series, and that's linked in the show notes.

Peggie Kirkland  6:24  
So I want to encourage you, not just today, International Women's Day, or the rest of Women's History Month, to make a practice of being kinder to yourself. Stop criticizing yourself when you mess up. Have some self compassion. Give yourself the grace to step away from situations and outcomes that you're unhappy with. Take a breather, and come back another day.  Feel sorry for yourself if you have to look put a timer on it.

Peggie Kirkland  7:03  
When I'm dealing with negative situations, I actually set the timer on my phone to send the signal to my brain, that there's a specific amount of time that I will invest in negative emotions. But when that timer goes off, I give myself a little pep talk as I shift my focus to doing something pleasant, that can change my train of thought and help me remember that I've overcome negative situations in the past, and I can get past the current situation. This attitude will help you deal with stress more effectively.

Peggie Kirkland  7:43  
If you keep rehashing the situation, you're likely to sink deeper and deeper into a hole that can be difficult to climb out of. According to Psychology Today online, researchers found that when you're hard on yourself, you're more prone to anxiety and depression. And it's more difficult to bounce back after a setback.

Peggie Kirkland  8:07  
Conversely, when you replace negative judgments, with self-compassion, you recover more quickly.  You can start to increase your self-compassion using practices like yoga, meditation, and relaxation exercises. Once you become your own advocate for self compassion, you can open sustainable pathways for creating and maintaining a legacy of love for yourself first, and then you can be equipped to fully love others in your family, your community and in the world at large. So ladies, what will your legacy be? Will it be one of self-love or self sacrifice? You decide.

Peggie Kirkland  9:02  
If you've been inspired and encouraged by the positive messages in today's show, please take a moment to rate and review the show on Apple podcast. This will help to keep the show alive. And remember, sharing is caring. So don't forget to share these gems with friends and family strangers to if you like let them know it's available wherever they listen to their podcast. I'm counting on you to share the love. Until next time. This is PK sending you much light and a whole lot of love.

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